


after the rain

by starberryteas



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fluff and Angst, Haikyuu!! Light Novel Spoilers, Haikyuu!! Manga Spoilers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, basically a trip down memory lane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:29:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26160415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starberryteas/pseuds/starberryteas
Summary: It ends with yearning, much like how it began.If Shouyou was honest, he wouldn’t say this was their ending. If anything, it was the beginning of something new for the two of them.“Tobio,” he whispered, mostly to himself, remembering the days he’d whisper the name like it was a lifeline. The name felt foreign, felt raw and full of meaning that he could only yearn for again.orKageyama and Hinata's love told backwards.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 2
Kudos: 43





	after the rain

**Author's Note:**

> basically just kagehina's love just from end to the beginning :)

It ends with yearning, much like how it began.

If Shouyou was honest, he wouldn’t say this was their ending. If anything, it was the beginning of something new for the two of them. A fresh breath of air, something refreshing that would replace what it once was. Maybe it was their ending for whoever they were before, whatever their relationship was, Shouyou wasn’t sure.

Looking out of the window in his tiny room in Brazil, Hinata couldn’t help but yearn for something more. Yearn to see the one person who believed in his strength, to see the only person he’d come to truly believe was someone he was meant to be with. Then he’d remember where he was, why that person was in Rio a few neighborhoods away from him, and he’d continue to yearn.

“Tobio,” he whispered, mostly to himself, remembering the days he’d whisper the name like it was a lifeline. The name felt foreign, felt raw and full of meaning that he could only yearn for again.

Shouyou ignored the vibrating of his phone beside him, closing his eyes as he reminisced for the days where Kageyama Tobio and Hinata Shouyou were standing on the nationals court in Tokyo, the crowd cheering for their quick attack. 

He bit his lip as the vibrating turned more frequent, obvious someone was calling him. He wondered if Tobio felt the same, yearned like he did for a time where they were together again. Shouyou wondered if it was the homesickness getting to him or if he truly felt like he needed to be on the court with Tobio again.

Shouyou turned his head to his phone, answering the call without even looking at the name of said caller. Maybe they were better apart, maybe it was always meant to be like this. Maybe their meeting at Karasuno was more of a coincidence if anything.

“You answer so late, dumbass. It’s not like you have anywhere to be right now,” the voice he’s come to love after so many years remarks through the phone. 

Shouyou decides to humor him rather than dump his feelings. “I was taking a shit, you loser.”

“You’re telling me you don’t bring your phone with you when you take a shit?” Tobio asks. 

Shouyou hums, looking out his window again. “Might fucking drop it in the toilet, Kageyama-kun.” He winces when the name leaves his mouth, more foreign than what he’d whispered just moments before answering the phone. It felt more raw, more unknown than he thought. “Why’d you call me?”

Tobio pauses before Shouyou registers that he’s shuffling around whatever room he’s in, as if he was looking for a distraction. Anything to not answer the question. But they know better. Shouyou knows they both know better, knows what will happen if Tobio chooses to ignore his question.

“I’m still in Rio,” he breathes out. Shouyou knows this. Tobio should know that Shouyou knows this. Yet he still continues, still says more. “In case you want to meet up.”

Shouyou almost breathes out a desperate _yes,_ stopping himself before he could say more. He can’t, not where he’s at now. He’ll get better and meet Tobio when he’s at his best, when they’re back in Japan. 

So, he lets himself chuckle a bit before responding. “No,” he says quietly. “I’m good.”

Tobio hums. “Okay.” Shouyou notices how Tobio never asks why. He knows Tobio wants to know why, but he doesn’t say anything. He stays quiet, he lets the silence speak the words he couldn’t tell Tobio.

They don’t talk after that, Shouyou able to hear Tobio’s breathing through the phone as they sit in an almost unbearable silence. Shouyou misses when these silences were comfortable, when they could sit and lounge around whenever they needed to without having to convey any sort of words.

That was long gone, they both knew ever since their third year things would go awry. Shouyou looked at the time he’d been on the phone with Tobio, a mere one minute and forty-two seconds. He let out a wet chuckle, for what they once were was gone.

“I’m going on ahead now,” Shouyou whispered, remembering the words Tobio had said to him once before.

He hears Tobio snort before he responds. “Okay, Hinata,” he says. Shouyou feels his heart clench at his family name. He hadn’t heard Tobio say it in so long, the very notion of hearing it making him want to jump into their third year and never leave.

 _It wasn’t a goodbye,_ Shouyou notices. He also notices how it wasn’t anything close to a _see_ _you soon_ or a _don’t talk to me ever again, dumbass._ He notices that Tobio didn’t want to leave yet. He notices that he didn’t want Tobio to leave either.

 _Let go,_ a voice is pleading with him inside of his head. Shouyou can’t let go of Kageyama Tobio. He wonders if Tobio let go of him, and sighs. _Let go,_ the voice says again. _Let go and start anew._

Shouyou lets himself breathe as the line goes dead, the contact name blearing at him as a reminder of who they once were.

He continues to yearn. He lays on his bed and yearns for the day he and ~~Tobio~~ Kageyama will meet again on the court. For now, they were just Kageyama and Hinata, two souls separate from each other once again until fate decides to put them together. 

Shouyou feels his stomach churn as he forces his brain to call his former partner by a name so foreign to him. Kageyama. Kageyama. Kageyama. Kageyama. Kageyama. _Kageyama._

His name repeats in his head so many times, and Shouyou just wants to run into his arms and scream _Tobio, I missed you so much, how was your game?_ He just wants to see Tobio and tell him _he’s made it, they’re going to play against each other and he’s going to win._

And he yearns, much like how it began. Yearns for Tobio, for a time when times were simpler, for tosses he missed so much. _Anew,_ the voice says. Shouyou sighed, running a hand through his hair.

Shouyou lets go of Kageyama Tobio, and yearns.

As soon as the words leave his lips, he feels a sense of relief. “See you, Kageyama!” Shouyou exclaims, smiling as widely as he can. If this was how their last meeting went before he had to go to Brazil, Shouyou was fine with that. If it ended with them smiling, he was okay with that. Fight forgotten, pride lost, everything numb, Shouyou felt a sense of calm between them.

“Yeah,” Tobio says, voice heavy with promises that would be fulfilled. “See you.” Then, “Hurry up and get a haircut already. You look like a damn bush, it’s all messy now.”

Shouyou smiles at this, their banter, snorting as he rolls his eyes. It’d been a while since he was able to banter this easily with Tobio. “Shut up, I was just thinking of cutting it.”

It’s more bittersweet, if anything. The curving of Tobio’s lips as he says this makes Shouyou want to burst into tears and tell him not to leave, not to go to North America, to stay until he has to go to Brazil.

But he doesn’t, he holds Tobio’s stare and hopes its enough. Enough to convey what he wants Tobio to hear, what he can’t let out when his voice had failed him. Tobio seems to understand, and just as the day had started, it had ended.

They walk outside of the gym, graduation certificates in their hands as leaves from trees blow past them, the spring air smelling heavier than usual. Shouyou glances at Tobio, letting a finger brush Tobio’s pinky.

They don’t say anything, knowing this was the last they’d ever see each other until at least three years later. Shouyou wanted to intertwine his fingers with Tobio’s own, but he doesn’t. It was unspoken between the two of them, the way their physical affection stopped.

Shouyou spared one last glance before stepping a foot forward, knowing that there was nothing more he could do. He couldn’t intertwine their fingers like he used to, couldn’t call out for him and surprise Tobio with a hug, couldn’t tell Tobio of his love and appreciation for him.

He feels a tug and he turns back, Tobio’s face close to his.

They share a messy kiss, Shouyou trying to will his tears away as Tobio kisses deeper. Shouyou would let himself have this just once if Tobio was letting him, so he decides not to hold back anymore. He kisses back as passionately as he could, hearing Tobio’s muffled noises of surprise.

Shouyou doesn’t want to let go of Kageyama Tobio, the feeling and adrenaline of the kiss still fresh in his mind. But, they let go, the kiss a lingering goodbye as they walked away from the school they called home.

Their fight was more intense than what Shouyou wanted it to be. It didn’t get physical, no one on the team got hurt, but Shouyou felt his heart twist in his chest every time the fight replayed in his head.

They were both heated, Shouyou knew this. Yet, he still decided to agitate Tobio, thus their fight starting. He’d never tell Tobio, but he blamed himself more than anything for starting their fight. _It wasn’t Tobio,_ he thought, _I started it._ He was the end of what they started together.

They fought a lot, that much was clear. Shouyou and Tobio clashed more than water and fire, but they always made up in the end. Shouyou always held on to that hope that it’d get better. It never seemed to.

“I get not telling me about the V.League,” Shouyou starts. _“But the Olympics?_ Why would keep that from me?” He puts a little more bite in his words than he first intended, but he supposed Tobio needed to hear how angry he was.

Tobio only crossed his arms, not sensing how angry Shouyou was. “Why is that such a problem? I didn’t even mean to keep it from you, dumbass.”

Shouyou groans. _“Because!_ It’s the _fucking_ Olympics, Tobio. _The Olympics!”_ Shouyou exclaims, exasperated and _tired._ Tired of being left behind. Tired of being in the dark.

“Excuse me?” Tobio asks. “I literally just got the invitation _yesterday._ The fuck do you expect me to do? Call you right away before telling my sister, my _family?”_

“Yes!” Shouyou screams. “Yes, Tobio, that’s what I expect! Instead you wait and tell the team _way_ after you made your decision一”

“Are you telling me you don’t want me to go to the Olympics?”

“No! That’s not what I’m saying at all!”

Tobio bit his lip, Shouyou observing that he seemed unsure of the next words that would come out. “Then what the fuck are you saying, Shou?”

Shouyou let our a shaky breath, not even sure of why he started screaming at his boyfriend in the first place. “I’m saying,” he starts, unsure of where to lead the conversation. “I’m saying you don’t tell me shit. You don’t tell me anything and decide on things by yourself.”

“It’s not my damn obligation to tell you anything,” Tobio grunts out as fast he can, not even taking the time to process what Shouyou had said, as if he knew. “Just like how you didn’t tell me how you were going to Brazil.”

Shouyou stills. “Not now,” he grits out. “Not now, Tobio.”

“Yes, now,” Tobio pushes. “You don’t get to scream at me for not telling you about going to the Olympics when you didn’t tell me shit about Brazil.”

“It’s not the same!” As always, Shouyou pushes back. He doesn’t back down, and he knows Tobio won’t, too. “The Olympics is not the same as going to Brazil, Tobio!”

Tobio hums, as if he realized something. “Are you jealous I got invited and you didn’t?” He asks, a tone rough and heavy, like he was accusing Shouyou of something.

And with that, Shouyou crumbles. He isn’t jealous. Just angry, if anything. But, he doesn’t voice it and says what he’s able to voice out. “Fuck you for _ever_ thinking I’ll be jealous of you. We’re supposed to be equals, _partners._ I’m never jealous of you. Fuck. You.”

He doesn’t miss Tobio’s scowl. “I never fucking said you were, I was just asking,” he says. “You’re my partner on this court,” he admits. “But out there? Do you think the Olympics sees us as equals?”

_Do you think the Olympics sees us as a partnership? Because they only want one of us. On that court, we aren’t partners._

Shouyou groans. “Fuck you, just shut up,” he hisses. Tobio’s said all he’s needed to, anyway.

“Whatever you’re thinking, that’s not what I’m fucking saying,” Tobio hisses. 

Shouyou knows this, knows Tobio has always loved him and pushed his strength to it’s limits. He knows this, so why did they even fight about it? “I’m sorry,” he whispers, grabbing onto Tobio’s hand and squeezing it.

Tobio decides not to push, instead asking, “You know I think we’re equals, right? Partners, remember?”

Shouyou wants to argue, say Coach Washijou once thought he was nothing without Tobio, say that’s probably what other people thought, but he doesn’t. Tobio always thought of Shouyou as a partner. That was all that mattered.

He doesn’t let go of Tobio’s hand that he’d suddenly held on to. He grips it hard, and lets himself cry as Tobio holds him close and tells him that they’d make it to the Olympics one day. Maybe after Shouyou wins a game, after Brazil, after Karasuno. Tobio doesn’t let go of Shouyou, even if their fight ended on terms that’d change the very bounds of their relationship.

Shouyou presses kisses to Tobio’s jaw, briefly forgetting about the pile of papers on the table in front of them. “Dumbass, we got shit to study,” Tobio says as lightly as possible.

Shouyou giggles, curling up against his boyfriend. “It can wait,” he whispers, letting his head fall onto Tobio’s shoulder.

“No, it can’t,” Tobio grumbles. “We need to pass these exams if we want to go Tokyo, Shou.”

Shouyou groans, his gaze meeting Tobio’s own. “We passed just fine last year.”

“That was because Yachi-san was helping us,” Tobio grunted. “She’s busy helping the managers in training since Ennoshita-senpai told her to.”

Shouyou sighs, letting his eyes flutter shut. Their second year was going better than they both had expected it to go, especially with their newfound relationship. Though, their grades hadn’t improved, and Shouyou still really disliked studying. “I don’t want to study,” he admits, peeking one eye open to peer at Tobio. “Do you?”

Tobio meets his gaze, a faint smile appearing on his lips. “Maybe,” he answers, glancing at the papers on the tables before looking back to Shouyou. “Are you tired?”

Shouyou hums, moving closer to his boyfriend. “Biking to Karasuno takes so much work.”

Tobio rolls his eyes as Shouyou shuts his own, feeling a hand thread through his hair. “You do it everyday,” Tobio supplies.

“Doesn’t make it any less tiring, Tobi,” Shouyou mumbles, Tobio’s hands in his hair making him feel drowsy.

“You’ll fail the exam,” Tobio says, whispering even as he protested Shouyou falling asleep.

Shouyou smiles, feeling himself slip into the darkness as he whispers, “Doesn’t matter, ‘m with you.”

Tobio doesn’t let go of Shouyou, whispering soft complaints about them not studying as Shouyou falls asleep on Tobio’s shoulder.

“I don’t know how to confess, he probably won’t understand what I mean!” Shouyou admits, scratching his hair. Sawamura and Yachi giggle slightly. “What?” Shouyou asks, exasperated.

“Well,” Yachi starts. “I don’t think anyone really knows how to confess! You just have to do it in words only you two can understand.”

“I agree,” Sawamura says. “If you can somehow convey all of this to Kageyama in your own way, he’ll understand.”

Shouyou sighs, not knowing how he was going to do it. He’d planned to do it that day, a day before Kageyama’s birthday so they could celebrate together, but he still wasn’t sure how. He planned on buying curry buns and milk on their way home from their last practice of the year, but he was stumped on the actual confession part.

“Oh! I have an idea!” Yachi exclaims, looking around to make sure Kageyama wasn’t listening. “I think it should come casually. Just have a normal conversation with him and confess in the middle of it!”

Shouyou looks at Yachi, fascinated. “Ah! That might work!” He exclaims, excited.

Sawamura nods, smiling at the two. “I think it’ll work. If he doesn’t notice, just keep repeating it until he finally realizes what you’re saying.”

Shouyou nods, grateful for the advice Sawamura and Yachi had given him. He does what planned straight after practice: go to Sakanoshita with his team, buy curry buns and milk, and wave goodbye to them as he walks up to Kageyama.

“Milk?” Kageyama asks, looking at the tiny box in Shouyou’s hand.

Shouyou nods, putting the milk and the curry buns in Kageyama’s hands. “For you! Since it’s our last practice of the year, or whatever,” he explains.

Kageyama graciously takes the curry buns and the milk, a little skeptical but seemingly grateful. “Did you buy some for yourself?” Kageyama asks.

Shouyou shook his head, smiling as Kageyama takes a bite out of a curry bun. “Nah, I didn’t bring enough money!”

Kageyama hums. “That can’t do,” he mumbles, digging into the bag and pulling out a curry bun and stuffing it into Shouyou’s face. “Here.”

Shouyou lights up, grabbing the curry bun happily. _“Uwaah,_ thank you, Kageyama-kun!”

“You don’t need to thank me,” Kageyama says, looking away. “You bought it, dumbass.”

“Well, yeah, but for you!” Shouyou exclaims.

Kageyama rolls his eyes, drinking some of the milk. “Don’t forget to buy yourself something, too.”

“Right, right,” Shouyou huffs, sneaking a look at his phone to look at the time. “Woah! We had our last practice until so late!”

Kageyama sneaks a look at Shouyou’s phone, humming. “Almost tomorrow,” he comments, sliding his milk towards Shouyou’s face.

Shouyou sips some of the milk before Kageyama pulls away, the two of them continuing walking in a comfortable silence. Shouyou lets out a small breath, realizing that they’re almost to the point where they part.

“Happy birthday, Kageyama-kun,” Shouyou whispers, not wanting to break the comfortable silence between them.

Kageyama hums. “Thanks, a little early though.”

Shouyou smiles, digging his elbow into Kageyama’s side as lightly as he could. “You know, your sets are so cool.”

Kageyama nods. “I know that better than anything, Hinata.”

Shouyou chuckles. “Yeah,” he says, grabbing onto Kageyama’s jacket as they continue walking. “I like you, you know. Like how I love volleyball.”

Kageyama stills, but doesn’t halt his walking. “Like how you love volleyball?” He asks, his voice quiet, confused, yet hopeful.

Shouyou nods. “Like how I love volleyball,” he confirms, looking up to Kageyama.

Kageyama’s lips turn into a wobbly smile. _Ah, it’s such a pretty smile,_ Shouyou thought, smiling fondly at him. “I… me too,” Kageyama admits. “Like how I love volleyball. I like you.”

Shouyou smiles as they lean in closer, pressing a kiss to each other’s lips, never wanting to let go.

It begins much like it ends, with yearning.

Shouyou wants to get better at volleyball, wants to beat the Kageyama Tobio that had told him that only the strong stay on the court, wants to beat the Kageyama Tobio that was strong and full of skill that he could only admire.

Shouyou plays with the Kageyama Tobio that was no longer a prisoner to speed, plays with the Kageyama Tobio that wants to work well with his team, plays with the Kageyama Tobio that wishes he could pave the way for every spiker that comes his way.

Shouyou yearns, yearns to get better at volleyball, but he has to take the first step with the Kageyama Tobio who refuses to let go.

So, he helps.

 _“I’m here!”_ Shouyou’s words echo through the gym, everyone staring at the now airborne Hinata Shouyou was no longer a prisoner to his height.

Kageyama tosses to him, looks at him like he’d been yearning, too, and tosses. Shouyou hits the ball, tells Kageyama he’ll always hit his tosses, and smiles.

Kageyama Tobio lets go of the past, walks forward with Hinata Shouyou, and yearns.

**Author's Note:**

> hehe hope u enjoyed :)
> 
> come talk about kghn with me :0   
> twitter: @starberryteas


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